The Covenantal Responsibilities of Fatherhood Pt. 1

In our last post, we considered God’s purpose in designing earthly, familial relationships.  God clearly ordained creation, the fall, the redemption of His people, and their glorification in eternity past for Christ is the Lamb slain before the creation of the world (Revelation 13:8).  It follows that the relationships between God as Father and His people as His children as well as Christ as the bridegroom and His church as His bride are models on which earthly familial relationships were designed.  Just as marriage should be a witness of Christ and His church (Ephesians 5:25-33), earthly fatherhood should teach us about our relationship to God as the heavenly Father.      

Since our relationship with our heavenly Father is covenantal, earthly fathers have a covenantal responsibility to teach their children about the heavenly Father.  Deuteronomy 6:4-9 is a synopsis of this responsibility. Fathers are to commit God’s Word to their own hearts and then be diligent in teaching those truths to their children (v. 6-7).  We cannot teach what we do not know, and we will not teach effectively that which we do not truly believe.  

Taking God’s Word to heart is more than simple assent to the truth of His Word.  To “take to heart” involves what the Scripture refers to as meditation.  Hebrew employs concrete images to convey abstract ideas.  The Hebrew word translated “to meditate” is the same word describing a cow chewing the cud.  It means “to mull over.”  To effectively teach our children, we must think biblically.  We must consciously reflect on God’s Word.  The Christian life is lived deliberately, not by intuition.

"We must consciously reflect on God’s Word.  The Christian life is lived deliberately, not by intuition."

God’s Word must be “on our hearts” because children are perceptive.  They can easily see through one who is disingenuous.  This is why to say “Do as I say, not as I do” is simply ineffective.  Many parents resort to this cliché, especially where the things of the Lord are concerned.  They do so because their own commitment to God is haphazard and inconsistent.  However, this will not work.  For example, an all-too-common practice among fathers is to send their children to church.  That is a clear dereliction of duty.  You should take them to worship with you.  Of course, if you are simply not going to go (if you insist on living like a pagan), do at least send them.  As they hear the Word of God, perhaps they will realize your hypocrisy and resolve to live a more godly life themselves.  My point is not to berate apathetic fathers but help them realize how their actions negatively impact their children.

How will children respond when you say, “Do as I say, not as I do?”  Even if they do not say so, they will at least think to themselves, “Why should I do what you yourself will not do?” “Why should I learn what you have not bothered to learn?”  “Why should I believe what you have not believed?”  “Why should I take seriously what you do not take seriously?”  Just as Moses explains, our own commitment to God’s Word is a prerequisite for properly teaching it to our children.  We must take it to heart before we can effectively communicate it to our children.

Moses’ instruction is not to simply communicate God’s commands to our children.  We are to teach His commands diligently.  The Hebrew word translated “teach diligently” means to sharpen.  It is used for honing the edges of a sword or an arrow.  The process of sharpening is meticulous and time-consuming.  Consistently repeated strokes are required.  In the same way, you cannot expect your children to learn God’s commandments upon a one-time hearing.  They will not truly learn God’s commands with a mere occasional nod to their application in a particular situation.  Diligent teaching requires relentless commitment.  The picture Moses paints is one in which God’s Word permeates the life we lead.

In our next post, we will consider how Moses describes the daily routine of fatherly covenantal instruction.